We should all avoid the Crab; two asses, eight legs, sideways dancing and suspiciously large abdomens.

Every night around six-to-nine JOHN would take his position on the dancefloor. Though not the brightest of stars, I saw his heliacal rising and knew it was game-on like Donkey-Kong. The way one dances reveals a lot about the sex, he came with five others called JOHN, that made six. With their six-to-nine moves they kept under their belts including; flip 'n flop, lift 'n tug, grip 'n slide and a really long hug. And that's where I fell into their claws, JOHN and co said just let go.

69696966969696969696969696969696969696969696969

JOHN - The Crab (69)

Video: Nik Dimopoulos / John Tsiavis / Johan Rashid
Johns: Adam Higgins / James Welsby / Jay Robinson / Courtney Moore / John O'Rourke
Music: Theatre Background - Stereogamous