Yesterday I walked outside my house and I found these sad-looking beans strewn across the sidewalk. They were getting trampled by ants. If I had any appointments that day, I would have canceled them. I set up my tripod and filmed the ants crawling all over the sad bean faces for a whole afternoon. It felt important at the time. It still feels important to me even now.
I was so excited about the ants and the faces and all of the possibilities between the two. I wanted to see if I could get them to do even more interesting things together. So I wrote up some really important poetry using honey and Coca Cola as ink, and I set the food poem on the sidewalk for the ants to swarm. I thought if I could get the ants to swarm my poem food, it would validate my writing more than any review in any journal at any university would.
But no matter what I tried, they ants wouldn't swarm like I wanted them to. I brought out old cake. I brought out bacon fat, and sugar granules. I searched "how to attract ant swarms" on Google. Nothing worked.
I thought ants' motivations were really simple. I thought ants were super dumb, but maybe they aren't. Or maybe ants are so dumb that it makes them impossible control. Too dumb to follow their own instincts, you know? I don't understand what motivates them for life at all. Is it just survival? Chaos? Is it blind, stupid hope? Either way, the ants won.
Music by Donovan.
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