IN HER EYES
WE MADE IT 4 U
a pow wow two summers ago
she sat quietly in the grass, her mother braiding her hair.
who are you?
and I knew.
I never thought about her that winter
or that spring
but when the summer came
I thought about her again.
dove off the dock
when it came.
I saw her there. dancing.
I saw it all in a dream.
we tracked her down.
that day in the the forest?
it was like watching an angel
making her way through life.
like an old soul.
like a pure vessel.
bringing us messages
and on the very last take
of our very last shot,
dancing in the fire at night,
her eagle feather fell to the ground.
the world stopped.
she offered tobacco
to right her wrong
but the feeling lingered.
I took it as a sign.
I thought myself genuine--
but I questioned why we were making this.
it had to be a tribute and an ode.
not a commercial. not a single. not a cry for help.
I let the film sit for months.
to think about what I had to do.
I met JJ in the club. Postiljonen delivered me on their wings.
The Embassy showed me my dreaming had no meaning.
but it's plain to see now
how I needed you.
Joakim gave me the light.
I told him the story of Lexi. my girl. the pow wow, the fallen feather.
we knew we had to make something.
we knew we had to make it right.
I took a walk around midnight to listen to Inner Light.
my world opened up
and when I got to Skanstullbron, snow started falling.
I couldn't stand it any longer.
I leaned over the bridge.
tears streaming down my face.
and cried and cried and cried and it wouldn't stop.
and couldn't stop.
I knew this was the sound of the images.
Inner Light was Lexi
Lexi was Inner Light
and maybe we always knew. in eternity.
a few months later,
just a week after seeing the final cut,
her mother died.
a heart attack. a broken heart for the rest of us.
she was her best friend. her confidant and care giver.
she was there on the shoot. making Lexi an Angel.
she's in that video.
her spirit is there.
this is about Indians. about all of us.
why we dance.
for our tribe.
it's about drugs, sex, blood, moonshine, Ojibwe and JJ.
it's about the Inner Light in all of us.
and we made it for you.
we had to.