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"Phantom Foreskin" music & lyrics by Sean Altman (publisher Big Sean Music — BMI). The first video from Sean Altman's JEWMONGOUS second album The Least Jewy Jew In Jewville was reluctantly produced and directed by Jeff Thacher of Rockapella and features Sean with James Baylis, Nathan Rose and Adam Spiegel grooving to the soultastic audio production of Jon Spurney. Check out JEWMONGOUS' other YouTube videos and subscribe to Sean Altman's channel.
Ever since that special day, Eight days after I was born, They cut a little something away, It's gone, gone, my soul’s in mourning, Sweet wine stopped my crying, But that missing link keeps testifying over & over & over & over again, ooh, Must be my phantom foreskin, Calling to me from the great beyond, My phantom foreskin, Circumcision couldn’t break that bond, My phantom foreskin, How could my schlong have been so wronged, I want you back, want you back, where you belong. Oh, I get a little vestigial shiver, North of my knees, South of my liver, Hashem is an Injun giver, To take back such a precious sliver, Time quieted my sobbing, But nothing can quell the throbbing from my knob, over & over & over & over again, ooh! Must be my phantom foreskin, A mystic twitch betwixt my britches, My phantom foreskin, An Itty bitty itch, I’m a stitch bewitched, My phantom foreskin, Your song’s the ointment for my joint, I want you back, want you back, where you belong! Oh, in the tumescence of morning, I wonder where you are, In a jar of old formaldehyde or wishing on a star, Well keep the faith my faithful sheath, Keep making noise from deep beneath my fly, 'Cause dreams come true, And one day I and you will reunite with Crazy Glue — A foreskin and his Jew! My phantom foreskin, Maybe you’re just a fantasy, My phantom foreskin, Maybe you’re just an STD, My phantom foreskin, Since you been gone can’t fill my thong, I want you back, want you back, where you belong, My phantom 1-2-3 foreskin....