First things first. Music, flung paint by the chuckle demographic - thanks, as always, R.

While I was sellotaping these clips together I was reading about Please Call Me Dave Cameron's Big Society malarkey.

I am not in his parish, but I thought he could do with a bit of help on this one.

Start again. Call it Bicycle Society and aim to get every person in Britain on bicycles. As for the dissenters – I am thinking M Thatcher might poo-paw anything that smells of Society - put her and the others on a ship postmarked Middle of Australia.

According to my crude interpretation/analogy a society that cycles is more equal than one that doesn’t.
Here in Japan grannies do it, kids do it, salary men do it, so do Yankees, the yakuza, teachers, nurses, office ladies, students, fashionistas, moms carrying an entire family, farmers, delivery men, chefs, the police, old men do it slowly with their knees sticking out, fixies, hipsters, local councilors, udon deliverers, students and anime characters do it too.

And they do it on the footpath and with out fancy lyrca, fancy bikes and helmets too. They just do it. People cycle because it makes sense.

And it’s not that they don’t like their cars in Japan. It’s just that cycling makes sense.

So that’s what Call Me Dave should be telling the people. Bicycle Society. Not this sound bite Big Society shite.

That ends my non-party political broadcast. ありがとう

Cycle on.

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