Well, it's been a half-century or so since the UN General Assembly told me I wasn't allowed to beat the daylights out of children. I've had time to grieve, time to think, and time to heal. I recently decided to stop wallowing and become a goat person for the modern world! After a little bit of price haggling, I hired the cheapskates handsome people at Curiosity Advertising to help me rebrand myself. This video is the beginning of what ended up being a long and painful process to make me a likable, family-friendly, holiday creature.

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