Sow vulnerability and reap intimacy. Sow truth and reap character. Sow encouragement and reap vision into your friendships. Sow loyalty and reap history. It doesn't start with the choice to suffer, but to love. When you love deeply, the opportunities to suffer will come, and you will grow through them.
It's hard to live in the tension of our desires and the world. We're not Angels and we're not animals. It's time to acknowledge the fact of our wanting, and to ask Jesus to step into it is. Invite God into an area of your want.