So when Jason said he was going to "CD Jungle" I jumped up and said I was going with him. I was thinking that if I hung out their long enough she might show up, maybe even hang out with us.
There were two places where I knew she might be that night: talking to Rob at CD Jungle, or at Westwood Lanes with Neil and Swap. The rest of the night, I don't know, driving around or at either Neil or Swaps house watching TV, I don't know. But there's a chance at CD Jungle or Westwood Lanes so I was getting out of that house.
It was good to be out with the windows down. I had my hand out the window, swatting at the occasional fog that flashed by. I touched my elbow, it still had the shape of the carpet in Jasons basement pressed into it. I didn't know if I'd manage to run into her tonight but anything was better than laying in Jasons basement thinking about that look she shot me at Jons house last week while Jason cursed at Super Mario Brothers 3.
"I'm gonna drive thru the park." Jason said. Damn it Jason.
"Lets just go to the store." I said, annoyed. If Jason was really just in a wandering mood, and we were in the car just to be in the car, we would never get to CD Jungle, Westwood Lanes, or anywhere else I wanted to go. We were going to spend the night picking left and rights based on when he felt a sudden squealing turn onto a side street would go well with the music on the radio.
"I want to see if they have something." I lied. He didn't say anything but a block later he made a turn in the right direction.
He was on to me. I was trying to be normal pretending it was every other night but he could see right thru me. I think. I don't know. Jason is hard to read.
What the hell was I going to pretend to be looking for once we got there? Something I know they don't have. I don't have any money to buy anything.
The sky is lighter. Morning? Jesus we've been sitting out here that long. It's freezing. I roll over and look at her.
She has fucking dew on her hair. Jesus Christ. We're lying on the hood of Mikes car covered with some kind of flowers from the tree in his yard, I'm still holding her hand when I wake at sunrise, and she's got dew on her hair.
There's a tiny leaf or something hanging on to her eyebrow that's driving me crazy. When I brush it off she opens her eyes and looks at me.
I kinda think I'm about to say every word I've ever known at the same time. Instead I say "You deserve some doughnuts."